Monday, 22 September 2014

MOM Vs MIL

Hi Anu, how are you doing? You went MIA on us. Hope you're okay. So, I'm pretty heavy and excited about having my princess. I've set up a room for her and bought stuff. My problem is I'll rather my mom come to help with the baby instead of my mom in law. How do I stop her from coming? Zainab

Yaaaay congratulations. Have a safe and mildly painful delivery :D I'm doing very well, thank you. 

You have two moms now. One was given by nature and the other by law, both by God. You should see your mil more as mom. She raised the man of your dreams, wants to help nurse the baby, has good intentions. It's so unfair to want to keep her away from the joy of grand motherhood. You'll be a mil someday by God's grace. How would you feel if your son or daughter in law wants you to stay away?

I do understand that you may be closer to your biological mom. You may be able to say "Mom stop it, don't bathe my baby with that" or "Mom I'm hungry o, won't you fix something for me to eat?" You may get to rest more but always remember you're a day closer to being a mil yourself. Feel free with your mil. Understand and love her. You'll get to the point you're with with your mom soon, hopefully.
I don't think you should favour a mom over the other. They are both your moms.

If there are more underlining issues why you would rather have your mom over. Don't be crafty. Discuss with your boo. If he is cool with him. Let him sort it out. Thank you for writing in. I hope I was of help. Hopefully, some bloghearts will enlighten us better.

Dear bloghearts, I'm sorry I went MIA like Zainab put it. If not that she wrote in, maybe I would not have  posted today. My phone was misbehaving. It's okay now but I can't seem to log back on blogger. If you were on my bbm, you may have to re-invite me. I need topics and posts o. Thanks in advance my people. Have a good good week. Love y'all. Anuoluwapo.

N.B: S/O to new blogheart Lara and the darlings you kept refreshing and those that missed my posts enough to reach out.

*MIA = Missing in action
 Mil = Mother in law

9 comments:

  1. I've always wondered about this too. Please discuss with your boo and be careful in selecting your words too. But then, what's your mums' opinion on this? What informed your choice? Is it just as a result of your closeness to your mum or you can already envisage some awkward moments between you and your MIL? Good luck to you dear poster.

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    1. Questions for you poster. Thank you Eniwealth

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  2. I like how you didn't tell her what you thought she'll want to hear

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  3. Home videos rarely portray MILs well and we've heard stories too but I'm a woman and will oneday be someone's MIL. Really won't like to be treated unfairly .

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    1. There are amazing mil!! Everyone claims their moms are awesome, yet these moms are the mil

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  4. Trust my mum, she made me lyk my MIL by force, she wl tell me she has three boys and if dere wives dont lyk her, how will I feel, thankfully, d only problem I av wth my MIL is too much care, I prefer her bn wth me dan my mum dt wl sing perfection to my ears, no offence, I luv my mum cz she wl tell u reality buh from day 1, I see my MIL as my mum, nd dt md evrythng easy, d pampering neva stops nd I try to tell her thngs I dont lyk in d most respectable and diplomatic way, I always look forward to her visits

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I refuse to be biased and judgemental. I look at issues from both sides of the coin, form my conclusions and allow you do same. Hopefully we can put ourselves straight in love.
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