You hear stories of friends messing with their friend's man. No friend would want to try that with me, seriously! I know my friends and I understand and trust them. Meaning I know the ones that can have direct access to him and the ones that go through me. Don't even go through me, whatever you want to tell him, tell Jesus. Jesus will sort it out for you. LOL! Satan can like to misbehave too so you have to voluntarily help the friends with direct access moderate their communications with him. But really, I can say "Ife please call dh, he'll sort it out or he is home, please pick up from him". I even remind him of their birthdays. I just refuse to be paranoid.
Dh is allowed to socialise reasonably. Yes, I trust him enough not to worry my pretty head when he is hanging out with the guys. I can't possibly be his only friend and I can't take up the space of the guys in his heart because he also would not stop me from loving my girls. No one should lose good friends or a healthy social life in the name of marriage. If I'm not good enough to be your friend after your wedding, maybe you shouldn't bother inviting me or selling aso-ebi to me, abi? A babe once told me she would have a praise night, no bridal shower or bach eve, so that her man wouldn't have a Bach eve as his friends would arrange a babe for him and he may even impregnate her. My question: Why are you marrying him if you don't trust him then? What kind of man are you with sef? I told dh weeks to our wedding that he should tell his friends to host whatever party they wanted to asap as I wouldn't agree to him being at a party on the eve of the wedding when he should be getting his beauty sleep. A babe even messaged me "Anu, I was at your boyfriend's Bach eve. Very nice party". My response was "hope you had fun?" I didn't want her gist, if I was getting the gist it would definitely be from the groom himself. I wouldn't have a praise night because I didn't want him at a Bach eve. That's not praise anymore, it's crafty.
I lived with my amazing parents for more than 20years and they were never checking or handling each other's phones. They weren't questioning each other's whereabouts or yelling at each other. I never saw a trace of trust issues, so why should I have one? It's rather funny when a girl says all men are the same, they all cheat. The men you were with didn't treat you right doesn't mean no other man will. Stop being paranoid. Give him a benefit of doubt, just like he is giving you. If he messes up, his loss and don't worry, Aunty Karma is still very much alive. Men cheat, so do women! Should we then say everyone cheats and all remain single and bitter? What you don't understand is that the more you forbid someone from doing something, the more he wants it. Trust your partner and if you don't, you have no business being in that relationship.
Nobody can snatch your man from you. He is an adult who has a right to make his decisions. Don't give me the juju thing, if he is prayerful and doesn't give her attention it will not work on him. What was he doing eating her efo in the first place or how did the charm laced on her girly part work on him? He tripped and fell into into it? Our partners are human and prone to mistakes, just like we are. Our prayers for them will do us all good. If he makes a mistake and you can forgive and live with it, please do and if you can't, move on but remember Matthew 6:12. Paranoia = High BP/Silly actions = Miserable life/Death/Regrets. Choose wisely. Xoxo
*Dh = Dear husband
PDA = Public display of affection
Afmag = Africa Magic
Lol = Laugh out loud
Asap = As soon as possible
Bach = Bachelor's eve
BP = Blood pressure
Matthew 6:12 = Forgive us as we forgive others
Xoxo = Hugs and kisses